🌿 From Fear to Trust: Embracing Risky Play

Remembering Freedom

Think back to your childhood. What are some of your favorite memories?

If you’re like me (a millennial or zennial — depending on your definition, born in ’82), many of your favorite moments probably involved some form of what we now call risky play.

Mine certainly do. I remember the freedom of being able to play independently, without constant adult supervision or strict rules. The top two that come to mind are: playing in my grandparents’ basement and exploring the nearby creek and woods with my best friend.

The basement felt like another world. My siblings and I were told simply to “go play”—and as long as we didn’t interrupt the adults upstairs, we had full reign. My grandpa’s carpentry tools were down there, my grandma’s sewing and art supplies, a greenhouse, books, and all sorts of treasures. We had unfettered access, and it was magical. We built, experimented, and imagined endlessly.

No one got hurt. No one was bored.

The same was true when my friend and I wandered the neighborhood or spent hours in the creek — barefoot, muddy, and fully immersed in our imaginary worlds. There were no phones, no tracking devices, no constant check-ins. Just trust and time. And we thrived.

🌼 What Changed?

Somewhere between then and now, something shifted.

Even as someone who grew up with freedom, I struggle to extend the same autonomy to my own kids. My son is 12, and I still hesitate to let him ride his bike around the block without me — even though he has his phone!

Fear creeps in, whispering what ifs about safety, judgment, and control.

So what changed?

Culturally, we’ve become more aware of danger — but also more afraid of it. We’ve replaced freedom with supervision, exploration with structure, and risk with protection. We want our children to be independent, but we rarely give them the space to practice independence.

The irony? In trying to keep children safe, we may be limiting the very skills that help them become safe, capable, and resilient humans.

🌿 The Value of Risky Play

Risky play isn’t reckless. It’s not about letting children do anything they want or ignoring genuine danger.

It’s about creating space for challenge, discovery, and trust.

When children balance on a log, climb a little higher, or run a little faster, they’re not just playing — they’re developing judgment, strength, and confidence. They’re learning how to listen to their bodies, manage fear, and recover from small mistakes.

And when we, as adults, step back just enough, we’re learning too — learning to manage our fear, to trust their instincts, and to find comfort in uncertainty.

🌸 Letting Go of Fear

Letting go doesn’t mean turning away from safety. It means redefining it.

Safety isn’t about eliminating every possible risk — it’s about helping children build the skills and self-awareness to navigate those risks wisely.

🌿 “Instead of ‘Be careful,’ try asking: ‘How does it feel to climb that high?’”

That one small shift changes everything — from fear to curiosity, from control to connection.

🌻 Embracing Risky Play — Together

It’s not easy to let go of fear. It’s a practice — one that takes awareness, community, and grace.

If you’re ready to begin this shift, I’ve created a free resource to help you get started:

🌿 From Fear to Trust: 3 Simple Ways to Support Risky Play

A gentle, practical guide to help you move from hesitation to confidence when it comes to risky play.

Download Your Free Guide

🌸 Related Reading: Why Kids Under Six Don’t Need Organized Sports

If you found yourself nodding along while reading this post, you might also enjoy another reflection from the Bee Balm blog:

💛 Why Kids Under Six Don’t Need Organized Sports

It explores how young children’s greatest learning doesn’t happen through structured programs or adult-led activities — it happens through open-ended play, movement, and connection.

Together, these two ideas — risky play and unstructured time — form the foundation of confident, capable, and joyful learners.